Today, I want to shed some light on a subject that has been on my mind lately. I am in a transition period of sorts in my life. It is a strange place for me to be. I know where I want to go and I know where came from. This limbo time is a bit of a struggle. I have been digging deep in the Word of God daily. I feel the Holy Spirit leading me to dig deeper, to lean in and trust God. He wants me to pursue Him like I never have before and that is what I am doing, “I think?”
Everyone wants a beautiful life I believe. Yet, why is it that some are thrust into this world in mud holes or in terrible living situations? Why do some come into the world with everything handed to them? Yet, there are others who scrapped the bottom of the barrel and made it to the very top with everything. I ask myself this question often. I never seem to come any closer to the answer. This year I made big plans. I made breaking bad habits my number one priority and setting the example followed in as a close second on my list of accomplishments for this year. Now, here it is mid July where do I find my ambitions but still sitting on the shelf. Every other week I will pull the list out and be laser focused with this Super Hero Wonder Woman readiness to take full on action and then…….BAM! No not really I just added it for dramatic purposes.
I am at this place, 41 healthy, young, ready to change the world. My mistakes are too numerous to count, but I have forgiven myself and moved past most of them. My kids, YES. That is a major hang up for me. I wanted to give them a beautiful life. I desired to shelter them with love, possessions to numerous to count, a big house and reliable cars in the driveway, family vacas, and holidays that would make Martha Stewart jealous. That never happened. I made lots of bad choices and few good ones here and there. Why am I sharing all of this? I believe this period I am in right now is the just before I get to enter the Promised Land. I must slay the Giants that still exist in my life. You would think I could easily recognize them. Truth is I don’t. In order to figure what they look like I am searching in God’s Word. Everyday, I wake up immediately go to my Bible. I am fully aware that if I want to know what they are that I must pray and submit to the Lord to find out. I decided yesterday to embark on a journey. A quest to learn all I can about what the Bible says about health and wellness, how my body is the temple of God, confess sins I have buried deep inside, submit, find out what my mission is now in my life. I know without a doubt that God wants all of us to have a beautiful life. We should be living in His abundance and peace. I find more often than not so many who are trapped, stuck in their own weakness. Trapped in bad habits, doubt and unbelief. I have been witness to people close to me who embrace their trappings as a form of comfort. Rather than break free they chose to stay in bondage. Fear controls them. I experienced my time with fear, it still grips me at times. I really do want to break free. One of my main goals this year was to be FREE! I feel a strong leading to be an example for others. If I can submit and allow God to teach me through His wisdom daily then I can help others overcome these traps that the enemy seeks to keep people in. I can’t go into detail about the specifics of what the Lord is leading but I am fully committed from this point. A beautiful life does not just happen–it is built daily by prayer, sacrifice and hard-work.
Lots of Love,
Amy aka JunkyGypsy